Sunday 15 April 2012

Twitter fiction

I worked out that I've written about 1,500 words of fiction on twitter under the hashtag #vss (very short story), and since I haven't posted anything here in a while I thought I'd take the lazy route and repost some of my favourites.

Some of these were written using 'tweet the random' rules that I'd made up: use a random word generator to come up with five words, use at least four of those in a #vss, hope like hell the story makes sense. So if some word choices seem a little more... well, random than others, you'll know why.

(Posted from March 2011 to now)


Your bloodstream is a liquid buffet to me. Rapids of sustenance spiralling round. Of course I don’t sparkle. I’m a leech not a firefly. #vss

“I told him. Don’t say those things about Mam and me” He’s calm now. Guards lead him away. The psychiatrist’s body cools behind him. #vss

A neat man, he liked to grapple with big questions. Was hate distinctive to humans? Did God exist? Can’t Tesco sell a nice sandwich? #vss

“I could just eat you up!” He starts to cry. His mum comforts him “Granny didn’t mean it!” His Gran bares her teeth, white and strong. #vss

Beauty products. Processed food, additives. A chemical taint. The decision not to eat human flesh is a matter of taste, not morals. #vss

Nuclear winter’s not so bad if you have the essentials, she thinks. A solid bunker-door. Provisions. Every series of Star Trek on DVD. #vss

‘Well.’, the witch thought vengefully as the oven door clanged shut, ‘At least the little bastards will end up with cavities.’ #vss

‘Let’s play a game.’ She ran her thumb over the knife. Licked off the blood and ignored their whimpers. ‘You hide and I’ll seek.’ #vss

The sun is shining and there’s the scent of new blossom on the air. The lid stays on the pills. Today is a good day not to die. #vss

“There.” Vicki drops the purple crayon she’d used to draw in the bruises. “Now Barbie looks just like Mummy.” #vss

When he reached the seashore he thought he was safe. Turns out zombie barnacles are very tenacious. #vss

“Look, we all voted. It was fair. Why the complaints?” Bob the cabin boy eyes the knife and wails “We’ve only been adrift for an hour!” #vss

You’re like a bog, she said, densely packed. I’m like the tundra. I only seem empty; you have to look close. I don’t get it, he said. #vss

“Ours was a tainted love” he said. “With melamine, like the milk scandal?” I asked. “Replies like that are why we split up” he said. #vss

‘Make Yourself An Exhibition!’ Should’ve read the fine print. My heart’s on a plinth, my face’s skin in a tidy silent scream behind it. #vss

We overthrew all the rules. Of physics. Geometry. Now we don’t know if up is down or what shape we are. And we’re so happy. #vss

I know the shining fracture in the sky is just the moon on the clouds. But it’s so bright and there’s the whole universe beyond it. #vss

“Well, would you prefer I called you gorgeous patronisingly or ironically?” he snaps. “Are those my only options?” she asks. #vss

I go on a biennial desert cure. It sears away my tears and dries up my heart, so I can show the world a cold face for two more years. #vss

“Divorce is a terrible thing” she says “How would the kids have coped?” I tell her she’s right and ask her gently to give me the knife. #vss

I’ve made an iron heart to replace my old ceramic one. This one is strong and will not crack or chip or shatter. Or let anyone in. #vss

It’s not been all bad, locked in this cellar for years. The ants made me their king, the wall’s a good talker and I’ve kept my sanity. #vss

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